being dumped by best friends/loved ones.

Sometimes what happens in life is not pleasing, is not what we want to happen, but it happens and we have no say in it. We feel helpless, bounded by the circumstances. We break.

And then we just drown ourselves in tears and curse our miseries and question as to why it had to happen. And we dwell in the past and consider the various alternatives we might have taken to avert what has happened, how different things wouldd have been if our actions had been different. "if, only if" is what we crib and remorse. We hate ourselves for our silly mistakes, blaming ourselves for the things gone wrong. This is when we really dearly are emotionally involved in the things gone wrong and have no heart to blame the others concerned(, who still remain dear to us). We blame ourselves thus. And so we dwell in the past and seek answers to unanswered questions, questions which might always remain unanswered, "why? why did it happen, what made it happen? and being totally unable to get in terms with normality."

This phase might be marked with imbalance in behaviour, where on one side we try to bring together the peices of life, we feel were shattered and scattered and on the other side our return to our remorse, insecurity gripping us every now and then and again the "Why" question bothering us all the same. We try to do things which might help us forget, and we succeed too but any unprecedented event, word or just about anything might spur back to zero all our efforts. We cry.

We cry. Exploding to share, to get a shoulder to cry our hearts out. We are lucky if we get one such shoulder. If not, life's more tough mentally.
We even might try to change, ourselves. Finding faults in oneself for things gone wrong and then hoping and ensuring we dont do those things again, with anyone. But we do, nature as they say, its difficult to change oneself no matter how much consciously we may try. So we behave the same. And gradually we realise there actually is no need to change. Absolutely no need at all. We are good the way we are, we accept the way we are and others too have to accept us the way we are. They shouldn't try to change us. Never ever, and we are not going to change for anyone.

Gradully the wounds might just get better, not worse. Thank god.

So it will be some time till we come to terms with the present. And getting interms with reality now after what has happened. We move on, yes now and then again peeping back to past, dwelling there for a while and then returning to ourselves, until this peeping becomes infrequent. Until that happens, the emotional imbalance can't be said to have gone. And then its gone. This is when we feel free.

We feel free. We feel unattached. We feel unconcerned. We feel the burden gone, off our minds and soul. We get our lives back, our mind back, our smiles back. Its no more artificial.

We reclaim what was lost. Obviously the time lost cant be reclaimed but future is now bright and colourful. We can now shape it and be responsible for our actions, actions which were being governed by our sorrow, our inability to forget and move on, until now.

With the promise to ourselves that history won't repeat itself we look ahead to a newer life, new challenges, with no strings attached, no emotional attachments,
just sweet caring, & friendship. We owe ourselves this much, dont we?

Hoping you do one day find that forever friend whom you are always searching for,that you thought you found and then lost dramtically, I end this expression of mine with some lines, distantly, though still related to the context.

"When you are up in life, your friends get to know who you are...
When you are down in life, you get to know, who your friends are ....."